Okay ... we've officially owned a Nintendo Wii for over a month, so it's time for the review.
However, first I must admit to something. This is my first Nintendo. Ever. This is such a new thing for me that I have to stop and think as I type the word "Nintendo" (I've made good use of the backspace key as I've misspelled it several times already).
The last "gaming system" I could claim part ownership to was the T.I. we played "Hunt the Wumpus" on as children. Sure, we had our Macintosh on which we'd play "MacMillionaire" (riveting!) or the later Macintosh on which we'd play "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?" (in black and white!), but nothing as extraordinary as the Nintendos with "Duck Hunt" and "Super Mario Brothers" that EVERYBODY else in the world owned (or so it seemed at the time).
So now I (we) own a Nintendo. And our lives will never be the same in many ways.
Way #1: Competitive racing. Not only have I proved that I can occasionally hold my own against Seth while playing MarioKart, but I have also proved that I can occasionally not be last place as we play against Seth's co-workers over the Internet. I am a speed demon, people.
Way #2: Body image. Wii Fit mocks me relentlessly as I strive to reach my goal of losing four pounds in two months, only to find myself farther away from my goal now than when I started. And then it has to mock me further by asking me why I am putting on weight (albeit only a fraction of a pound). Is it overeating? Snacking? Succumbing to idiocy and buying Wii Fit?
Way #3: Boo-boos. Already I have suffered multiple injuries from playing the Wii. I couldn't move my shoulder for days after swinging a "bat" a million times just for a few coins in Mario Party, I couldn't laugh without clutching my abs in pain after doing planks in Wii Fit, and I couldn't let anything brush against my side after I got what I thought was a hernia while doing jackknives in, again, Wii Fit. (Turns out it was an internal infection ... so, technically it's not Wii-related. Or is it? Wily Wii.)
Way #4: Trendiness. Okay ... so despite the loserness I experience with MarioKart, the not losing enough I experience with Wii Fit and the limbs I lose ability to use with multiple games, I am cool. I own a Wii. Now maybe I can convince Seth that we need an iPhone.
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