becoming that which i despise

If you've ever spent any time on YouTube, you'll find that a large percentage of the videos out there are average Joes and Janes, sitting in front of their webcam, singing along with their guitars or their toy electronic keyboards. Some are original songs. Most are covers. Many are terrible.

I've spent some time watching these offerings, and mocking them. "Why would you post this?" I think. "This is terrible! How could you possibly think this would somehow benefit anybody, anywhere?" I watch them, and I despise them.

Yet I am drawn to them. Secretly, inwardly, I want to be one of them.

I can't figure it out. I've tried to come up with a million rationalizations behind it, some more believable than others: "I could do better than this!" Well, maybe better than some. Probably worse than others. "I don't play guitar or write songs as much as I used to, this would give me a reason to do so." Okay, I guess I buy that one, but I could (and should) play more without having to put it on YouTube. "My friends could see me 'perform.'" I suppose, but do they really want to? I can't imagine the lot of you have been sitting out there wishing, "Dang, I wish I could go to, like, a Seth Grover concert right now. That would be rad."

Those of you who really, really know me, though, can guess the real reason behind this: I like attention. I've always liked to perform for people. Whether it be a high school talent show, Guitars Unplugged up at Ricks/BYU-I, jamming with my brother's Jazz combo in the mall for Dillards at Christmas (for free, I might add), or just making my wife listen at home, I like it. It's a thrill for me.

So we're going to try this experiment. At least once a week I'm going to record a video of myself and post it to YouTube. Some of the songs will be originals, some will be covers. Some will probably suck. Some might not be too bad. I'm not going to make a big production out of preparing for it; I'm going to just decide on a song, play it once or twice beforehand to make sure I know the words, then hit "record." Let me know if you like it, hate it, or couldn't care less.

So, for our first act, "Walking" by Seth Grover.

Click here if you've just got to have a recording of this for your iPod.